Well, school started last week, on Tuesday, its been a fun week, though I don't really want to talk about why it was so fun. It just makes me out to be a bad person. The race against time to get myself papered for my hopeful study abroad has began as the school year began. Hopefully next Fall at this time I will be half way across the globe once again in Japan this time more likely not in Tokyo, possible in Osaka or Nagoya.
I have my Three choices (you have to have three for the exchange program I am going through). Nazan, Kansai Gaidai and Ritsumeikan . Two are in Nagoya and one in Osaka.
Now I need to decide which one I want to have has my first and second; Ritsumeikan being my third. I don't care for its program very much, at all. I like my ability to choose some of my language courses at Nazan (you have eight hours of required standard hours, and then you can choose your other 6 to 10 hours, including more indept language study classes focusing in an area). Though I know from people who have went about Kansai Gaidai and its programs.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Because once in a while a short post is good.
This evening while drinking a chocolate milkshake at what could very well be called my farewell party, I had a profound realization:
This summer with all its interesting moments has been the best summer of my life.
And a small bit of me that sometimes thinks it just knows stuff, thinks this is going to be the best summer of my entire life, period.
This summer with all its interesting moments has been the best summer of my life.
And a small bit of me that sometimes thinks it just knows stuff, thinks this is going to be the best summer of my entire life, period.
Friday, July 31, 2009
And for the first time in Five years...
I am unemployed. I am very temporarily a NEET!!! ::image me doing dramatic seeing- something-horrifyingly-awful faces::
Actually I am not overly upset about this, though the shock of knowing I was let go because my mother was being laid off, was very much so. Yes, my mother was laid off, which sent waves of terror through the plant, because you see my mother does everything paper work wise for that plant. I use to think my mother was over stating her value, but since working there, I realized if anything she might have been understating it. They got rid of her and seventeen other highly crucial members of the staff; so they think they are all just waiting for their papers. Which wasn't too surprising as the company almost went under a little under a year ago (before the 'crash') and the parent company of the company hired a very efficient CEO for the company of Asian descent who does a lot of work in Hong Kong with a twelve month contract. With interesting rumors as to his connections in Hong Kong.. . He is one of the people who are sent out on save or bury companies that aren't doing well for bigger/ often parent companies. He has been here for eight almost nine months, the company doesn't look good.
<.< So yeah. THat was my day. Work for four hours, get told I was laid off, had lunch and then went home and got some much needed sleep.
Actually I am not overly upset about this, though the shock of knowing I was let go because my mother was being laid off, was very much so. Yes, my mother was laid off, which sent waves of terror through the plant, because you see my mother does everything paper work wise for that plant. I use to think my mother was over stating her value, but since working there, I realized if anything she might have been understating it. They got rid of her and seventeen other highly crucial members of the staff; so they think they are all just waiting for their papers. Which wasn't too surprising as the company almost went under a little under a year ago (before the 'crash') and the parent company of the company hired a very efficient CEO for the company of Asian descent who does a lot of work in Hong Kong with a twelve month contract. With interesting rumors as to his connections in Hong Kong.. . He is one of the people who are sent out on save or bury companies that aren't doing well for bigger/ often parent companies. He has been here for eight almost nine months, the company doesn't look good.
<.< So yeah. THat was my day. Work for four hours, get told I was laid off, had lunch and then went home and got some much needed sleep.
Monday, July 20, 2009
The trip is well over but the universe isn't done with me.
Well this journal is suppose to be about my life travels , but by god I need to rant so I am going to rant here. No one actually reads this thing anyways, especially now that the trip is well over.
GAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
My life is just awful. In the worse kind of way, that you can't tell anyone why its so awful because its not socially okay.
You can't tell you best friend you are seriously pissed off that you are jealous about her possible budding relationship with the close friend of you both who has been in love with her since eight grade who you have been equally interested in. And the fact that you are finding that your remember all seven years of having quietly watched him watch her and its turmoil. That you aren't even sure that you even like him as any but a friend anymore either, but his flirting behavior despite saying he has no interesting is FUCKING CONFUSING...AND you definitely can't say your not sure if your jealous of her because he likes her or wanting to kill him because you worry he is only interested in her because she has big boobs and will try to isolate her from you. So you feel confused as to whether or not you are jealous of him for having her attention...And that this is the first guy whom you haven't completely given up on once they tell you " Sorry Em, I really like your friend XXXX, Do you know what she thinks of me?" in ten minutes and proceed to help them find happiness. that what you are suppose to do. You actually tried to figure out a way to push back. YOU NEVER DO THAT. you know this has been what has happened every time you have liked a guy.
You can't say you aren't sure that you are feeling this way because you missed your chance to tell the guy you like from College, who you know you like, that you like him at the end of your 'class' together, because you didn't want to ruin your class with something stupid and useless like your feelings. And now you feel cruel because the only reason you were going to tell him was because you wanted to get over him, because you know he (like every other guy) could never like you beyond that of a "friend". Which is praise worth as most people don't even think of you as human.
You met the one guy who ever called you fat, ugly, stupid and generally say your an awful person and it does not even seem so bad. He was the only person who really made you feel like you weren't the only one always rejected and never had anyone like you back. You never thought that playing arcade / video games were fun or even romantic until you hung out with him, and you can't decide if you are happy or not that you will never see him again or not.
You can not talk to anyone about the fact at twenty you are basically going through menopause, and by the end of the year you won't even have Aunt Flo visit you anymore, if the quacks that are doctors are right. And there goes what you have come to believe was your only chance at ever getting a date (a guy who desperately wanted a family was my only hope), and I won't even become the old lady with the million cats because honestly I don't make the best pet owner unless its a fish.
You don't know anything about your best friends from High school anymore, and you are pretty sure they all hate your guts but you are the only one with a car big enough to fit them all in one vehicle so they deal with you.
And this is all on top of a stressful, minimum wage job in the office of the company my mum works for that I highly doubt will last the year in its current mess. Which is made worse by the fact you have been getting paid two dollars an hour more, and had great people to work in Boone but you didn't have the money to stay there.
AND it all leads up to me wanting to go clubbing???!? Seriously, I want to go out in some comfy clothes and dance my mind numb and forget this all, but I have no one to go with and even I am not dumb enough to go clubbing in my area alone.
that my life, and my rant.
GAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
My life is just awful. In the worse kind of way, that you can't tell anyone why its so awful because its not socially okay.
You can't tell you best friend you are seriously pissed off that you are jealous about her possible budding relationship with the close friend of you both who has been in love with her since eight grade who you have been equally interested in. And the fact that you are finding that your remember all seven years of having quietly watched him watch her and its turmoil. That you aren't even sure that you even like him as any but a friend anymore either, but his flirting behavior despite saying he has no interesting is FUCKING CONFUSING...AND you definitely can't say your not sure if your jealous of her because he likes her or wanting to kill him because you worry he is only interested in her because she has big boobs and will try to isolate her from you. So you feel confused as to whether or not you are jealous of him for having her attention...And that this is the first guy whom you haven't completely given up on once they tell you " Sorry Em, I really like your friend XXXX, Do you know what she thinks of me?" in ten minutes and proceed to help them find happiness. that what you are suppose to do. You actually tried to figure out a way to push back. YOU NEVER DO THAT. you know this has been what has happened every time you have liked a guy.
You can't say you aren't sure that you are feeling this way because you missed your chance to tell the guy you like from College, who you know you like, that you like him at the end of your 'class' together, because you didn't want to ruin your class with something stupid and useless like your feelings. And now you feel cruel because the only reason you were going to tell him was because you wanted to get over him, because you know he (like every other guy) could never like you beyond that of a "friend". Which is praise worth as most people don't even think of you as human.
You met the one guy who ever called you fat, ugly, stupid and generally say your an awful person and it does not even seem so bad. He was the only person who really made you feel like you weren't the only one always rejected and never had anyone like you back. You never thought that playing arcade / video games were fun or even romantic until you hung out with him, and you can't decide if you are happy or not that you will never see him again or not.
You can not talk to anyone about the fact at twenty you are basically going through menopause, and by the end of the year you won't even have Aunt Flo visit you anymore, if the quacks that are doctors are right. And there goes what you have come to believe was your only chance at ever getting a date (a guy who desperately wanted a family was my only hope), and I won't even become the old lady with the million cats because honestly I don't make the best pet owner unless its a fish.
You don't know anything about your best friends from High school anymore, and you are pretty sure they all hate your guts but you are the only one with a car big enough to fit them all in one vehicle so they deal with you.
And this is all on top of a stressful, minimum wage job in the office of the company my mum works for that I highly doubt will last the year in its current mess. Which is made worse by the fact you have been getting paid two dollars an hour more, and had great people to work in Boone but you didn't have the money to stay there.
AND it all leads up to me wanting to go clubbing???!? Seriously, I want to go out in some comfy clothes and dance my mind numb and forget this all, but I have no one to go with and even I am not dumb enough to go clubbing in my area alone.
that my life, and my rant.
Sunday, June 14, 2009
The last few day I FOUND THEM.
I am outrageously tired and I have to up at 6 am to leave for work and its now SHIT 2 am so I am posting these all as one post, I might later split them up.
Have a great night.
Day 3:
Well, the day is done, I am tired and I am sligtly offended, actually my pride is a bit. Today was another busy day. the Day began like any other though it was a bit different, Breakfast, followed by our group spliting up into many mini groups. My group first went to Asukura which is the biggest Shrine 'district' in Tokyo, and I did some shopping. I picked up the requested keychains, some other cool stuff, and my own personal favorite some lucky cats. I am a huge fan of Lucky cats, my current Boss, gave me two for my computer and scanner and I swear the work got easier and they are a comforting thing to see everyday. A waving smiling cat, is so cute!
I plan to come back on Saturday, if the girls who I met this afternoon don't make plans for us, they seemed more interested in doing something on Sunday though, so I doubt there will be conflict of schedule there...
The group then went on to the 5th Avenue of Japan of which real name I do not remember Yamamoto Sensei's description of it as we walked down it was much more impressive on my mind than its name. This was followed very shortly by us going to the public park infront of the Imperial palace that you can't enter but on special days (like holidays and only with a ticket from what I understood) Then we had lunch as this neat restuarant and then ran like mad to Metro and then to the college. we were almost late, though well over half the group didn't show up. The class we sat in today was taught by one of the Professors he normally teaches MArketing classes, but as a treat to his students and us, he paired us up with two Japanese Students and had us come up with Kanji Japanese names for us. It was really cool but it seemed a bit long, I know traditional the entire Japanese name has four Kanji and my first name had six alone!
After than we split into even smaller groups and went with groups of the College girls to different locations. Charles, Chad, Trey and I went to the Electric City (Akihabyu I believe), we ended up going to a number of place including a massive Anime/Otaku store, A maid cafe and a really weird tourist stop they thought we might have wanted to go to. The MAid cafe was interesting. I spent most of it giggling with on of the girls because we both felt out of place and at the same time half interested too! YAY for nervousiness bringing people together!! After all that we went to have dinner, which was interesting. It was really good. Everyone had lots of pictures save me of course. I don't really do picture taking on this trip, didn't have a camera you see. Then Trey paid for everyone's dinner. The Feminist in me was quite offended, I felt it was Okay for him to pay for the girls dinner since they were so nice and took us around, and if Charles and Chad weren't going to say anything I was disappointed in them BUT I could not let it happen. And then He underminded my reasoning and was stumped long enough to be distracted from the subject!
Bed I need Sleep
Day 4:TOURIST DAY IN JAPAN.
basically i am wore out and am not going to write much. Today we did basically tourist stuff. We first went to our hosting Sensei's (Hero) family's Kimono Shop and tried on Kimono (if we so choose to) I tried on this pretty Yukuta that I actually bought, and then we explored the shopping area that the Shop was part of, and had lunch there. We then went to the Edo Museum, if I wasn't so tired and took pictures (I bought a camera today though Dr, Fox says I might not be able to get it Developed in the states) I would go on and on about it beauty and how amazing and confusing fun it was but I am tired, and then we went to the Sumo tornument that was going on for a few hours, I wasn't very interested though I think its because I am so tired, I think the non stop go go is starting to catch up with me today. Hopefully nothing bad will happen today.
Day 5: SOny and harley Davidson:
Today was amazing we went to Harley Davidson and Sony as the Group plus Hero Sensei. I really like Hero Sensei, he is fun to talk to, though very nervous sometimes. Harley Davidson is really not that different from any other Harley Davidson Main office, but I have only toured one other so maybe I am wrong, and Sony was amazing! They gave us a tour of their Show room and did some hands on showing of how some of the high end Professional grade equipment works WHICH WAS AWESOME!! The we had a presentation and Q&A time, I was maybe the only one who asked a question and I threw everyone for a loop, because I asked questions about marketing there professional lines not just their consumer lines, as I am actually more familar with there Professional lines than consumer lines. No one expects that from a 20 year old, only the international Marketing head knew what I was talking about when I explained why I was interested in their work.
After that we came back to the Dorm, and I took a nap. then I woke up and began writing this.. some one is knocking on my door, so I will get up.
Day 6:
Free day. I swear I will write later about today but I am so tired. basically I wanted to tell you that I went drinking with Honul and James after the Knock, it was fun. We wandered around couldn't find the restuarant James wanted us to try so we tried another, I was teased about never eating much and then they talked me into buy this really good tasting Alchoholic fruit beer which was awesome. you couldn't taste the alchohol which is god sent.
basically today I went back to Menji Shrine, and ASukura wander about both places, got lost in both places, and then meant to take a nap then ended up going with Erica and some of the group for dinner and drinks staying out until I was tired and had no money (about 9:30) then rode the Metro back to the Hotel. And am now going to sleep.
The last day:
Its the noon on the last day of the trip and I AM PISSED. Basically my attempt to stay in so I could go with the guys if they got notice that we were going to met the girls from Wednesday to go out and do something ended up getting me left behind. THOUGH i HAVE got a really good nap after that, though my throat is a bit rough I think I have allegeries going on do to the rain today bring down the pollen. I mean to write more about yesterday but there was nothing I feel like writing about or may I just can't describe it. Anyways, I have to go get ready for the tea.
LAter:
The tea was amazing I can't describe it and I need some sleep I am so tired I still have pack. and I can't find some of the stuff I packed up in taiwan and haven't touch since. AHHHHH... Night journal
MONDAY almost home:
Wow this morning was hectic in the slow oh god when will we get there type of way. We were all prepare for things to go wrong and then nothing went wrong so we spent two hours on the train platform waiting for the train we were suppose to ride to arrive. I am writing this on the plane, and I think I will take a nap and wake up later. NIghts.
I am home, and I am tired my folks are being annoying and trying to feed me. I am not sure I want food right now I just want to sleep! Let me Sleep damnit!!!
Have a great night.
Day 3:
Well, the day is done, I am tired and I am sligtly offended, actually my pride is a bit. Today was another busy day. the Day began like any other though it was a bit different, Breakfast, followed by our group spliting up into many mini groups. My group first went to Asukura which is the biggest Shrine 'district' in Tokyo, and I did some shopping. I picked up the requested keychains, some other cool stuff, and my own personal favorite some lucky cats. I am a huge fan of Lucky cats, my current Boss, gave me two for my computer and scanner and I swear the work got easier and they are a comforting thing to see everyday. A waving smiling cat, is so cute!
I plan to come back on Saturday, if the girls who I met this afternoon don't make plans for us, they seemed more interested in doing something on Sunday though, so I doubt there will be conflict of schedule there...
The group then went on to the 5th Avenue of Japan of which real name I do not remember Yamamoto Sensei's description of it as we walked down it was much more impressive on my mind than its name. This was followed very shortly by us going to the public park infront of the Imperial palace that you can't enter but on special days (like holidays and only with a ticket from what I understood) Then we had lunch as this neat restuarant and then ran like mad to Metro and then to the college. we were almost late, though well over half the group didn't show up. The class we sat in today was taught by one of the Professors he normally teaches MArketing classes, but as a treat to his students and us, he paired us up with two Japanese Students and had us come up with Kanji Japanese names for us. It was really cool but it seemed a bit long, I know traditional the entire Japanese name has four Kanji and my first name had six alone!
After than we split into even smaller groups and went with groups of the College girls to different locations. Charles, Chad, Trey and I went to the Electric City (Akihabyu I believe), we ended up going to a number of place including a massive Anime/Otaku store, A maid cafe and a really weird tourist stop they thought we might have wanted to go to. The MAid cafe was interesting. I spent most of it giggling with on of the girls because we both felt out of place and at the same time half interested too! YAY for nervousiness bringing people together!! After all that we went to have dinner, which was interesting. It was really good. Everyone had lots of pictures save me of course. I don't really do picture taking on this trip, didn't have a camera you see. Then Trey paid for everyone's dinner. The Feminist in me was quite offended, I felt it was Okay for him to pay for the girls dinner since they were so nice and took us around, and if Charles and Chad weren't going to say anything I was disappointed in them BUT I could not let it happen. And then He underminded my reasoning and was stumped long enough to be distracted from the subject!
Bed I need Sleep
Day 4:TOURIST DAY IN JAPAN.
basically i am wore out and am not going to write much. Today we did basically tourist stuff. We first went to our hosting Sensei's (Hero) family's Kimono Shop and tried on Kimono (if we so choose to) I tried on this pretty Yukuta that I actually bought, and then we explored the shopping area that the Shop was part of, and had lunch there. We then went to the Edo Museum, if I wasn't so tired and took pictures (I bought a camera today though Dr, Fox says I might not be able to get it Developed in the states) I would go on and on about it beauty and how amazing and confusing fun it was but I am tired, and then we went to the Sumo tornument that was going on for a few hours, I wasn't very interested though I think its because I am so tired, I think the non stop go go is starting to catch up with me today. Hopefully nothing bad will happen today.
Day 5: SOny and harley Davidson:
Today was amazing we went to Harley Davidson and Sony as the Group plus Hero Sensei. I really like Hero Sensei, he is fun to talk to, though very nervous sometimes. Harley Davidson is really not that different from any other Harley Davidson Main office, but I have only toured one other so maybe I am wrong, and Sony was amazing! They gave us a tour of their Show room and did some hands on showing of how some of the high end Professional grade equipment works WHICH WAS AWESOME!! The we had a presentation and Q&A time, I was maybe the only one who asked a question and I threw everyone for a loop, because I asked questions about marketing there professional lines not just their consumer lines, as I am actually more familar with there Professional lines than consumer lines. No one expects that from a 20 year old, only the international Marketing head knew what I was talking about when I explained why I was interested in their work.
After that we came back to the Dorm, and I took a nap. then I woke up and began writing this.. some one is knocking on my door, so I will get up.
Day 6:
Free day. I swear I will write later about today but I am so tired. basically I wanted to tell you that I went drinking with Honul and James after the Knock, it was fun. We wandered around couldn't find the restuarant James wanted us to try so we tried another, I was teased about never eating much and then they talked me into buy this really good tasting Alchoholic fruit beer which was awesome. you couldn't taste the alchohol which is god sent.
basically today I went back to Menji Shrine, and ASukura wander about both places, got lost in both places, and then meant to take a nap then ended up going with Erica and some of the group for dinner and drinks staying out until I was tired and had no money (about 9:30) then rode the Metro back to the Hotel. And am now going to sleep.
The last day:
Its the noon on the last day of the trip and I AM PISSED. Basically my attempt to stay in so I could go with the guys if they got notice that we were going to met the girls from Wednesday to go out and do something ended up getting me left behind. THOUGH i HAVE got a really good nap after that, though my throat is a bit rough I think I have allegeries going on do to the rain today bring down the pollen. I mean to write more about yesterday but there was nothing I feel like writing about or may I just can't describe it. Anyways, I have to go get ready for the tea.
LAter:
The tea was amazing I can't describe it and I need some sleep I am so tired I still have pack. and I can't find some of the stuff I packed up in taiwan and haven't touch since. AHHHHH... Night journal
MONDAY almost home:
Wow this morning was hectic in the slow oh god when will we get there type of way. We were all prepare for things to go wrong and then nothing went wrong so we spent two hours on the train platform waiting for the train we were suppose to ride to arrive. I am writing this on the plane, and I think I will take a nap and wake up later. NIghts.
I am home, and I am tired my folks are being annoying and trying to feed me. I am not sure I want food right now I just want to sleep! Let me Sleep damnit!!!
MOre to post just have to find them.. Sorry people.
Sorry about the fact I have not posted this stuff. I am working full time, and I have been typing up these thing and then meaning to post them in big batches, because my internet is sketchy.. but then something happened to my document files and everything has been moved to different files so I am hunting them down as I type. Its a bit hard. Sorry for the issues with this.
First day in Japan
ANd we hit Japan running. Our first full day in japan began with a great brakfast. It was the all-you-can eat breakfast at the Olympic center where we were staying. Rice, eggs, salads, fruit, miso soup, and much more. And really good coffee. I love coffee. following Breakfast we had a briefing in the meeting room for the daily schedule and a lecture on being Punctuational and dressing correctly, followed by half the group going back to the room to change because they weren't dressed correctly. After the business is done, we get on the Metro, more difficult than the Taiwan subway though not much to me though I feel I was the only one who thought so, to visit the Meiji Shrine. The Meiji Shrine was erected in commemoration of the Meiji Restoration, a very important part of Japanese history as basically japan opened up trade with the rest of the world and advanced to a world power in a series of few decades what it took most of the West to do in Centuries. This Shrine is absolutely amazing. It is so beautiful. The shrine is surrounded by a large natural "reserve." I say park, but that doesn't really describe it. The area is basically a wooded area with creeks, woods with little to none of that stupid 'care' that people do to make a parks living members 'perfect', and several commemorative and decorative items interspersed. Can you tell I hate the idea of maintaining nature space! Its like having grass you can't walk bare food on. WHY DO that?!? We only got to go to the see the shrine, we didn't have enough time to go in the shrine itself. Either way, I am so glad I got to see it, and I am going to see in on Saturday again on my free day. YAY. I wonder what else I will do then?
Our second main attraction for the day was Gakoshuin University. This college is very very beautiful and with extreme security though I don't think the rest of my group noticed it at all, but it also serves as a high, middle, and elementary school or that the building are close by with a very small wall between them. This is the school where the Imperial families attend, and this college is an all women's college. Our first visit here is to get acquainted with the students as well as observe some of the cultural classes offered in the school. Which I found out is really what the school offers, Japanese culture classes, and a study of Delomatic studies that High ranking members of Japanese society need to know to work within their circles. SOunds Fishily like they are being trained to be the perfect wife for politics to me. Hey I am almost a Femist on this matter. This school has a cirriculum which incorperates a large amount of japanese history and culture. We observed the flower arranging class before for dinner with erica.
For dinner we went out with Ericka and some of her friends for a traditional Japanese meal. Ericka is a local who had come to ASU for a brief visit. She is a friend of Dr. Chen and Dr. Fox, basically she was a bit lost on campus and wanted to talk to some one who knew her language culture and got Dr. Fox from what I understood. Several of her friends are graduating soon or have graduated and are lining up big time business and marketing jobs all over the world.
Lastly, we took a stroll through the red light district, guided by Dr. Chen. Let's just say it was interesting, and I taught Dr. Chen the word Sketchy!!! Needless to say, I think that I will avoid such places at night for the rest of the trip because it was bit sketchy just because everyone was trying to get us into their shops.. Now to Bed, I feel so tired which seems stupid because I feel like I have done nothing.,
Our second main attraction for the day was Gakoshuin University. This college is very very beautiful and with extreme security though I don't think the rest of my group noticed it at all, but it also serves as a high, middle, and elementary school or that the building are close by with a very small wall between them. This is the school where the Imperial families attend, and this college is an all women's college. Our first visit here is to get acquainted with the students as well as observe some of the cultural classes offered in the school. Which I found out is really what the school offers, Japanese culture classes, and a study of Delomatic studies that High ranking members of Japanese society need to know to work within their circles. SOunds Fishily like they are being trained to be the perfect wife for politics to me. Hey I am almost a Femist on this matter. This school has a cirriculum which incorperates a large amount of japanese history and culture. We observed the flower arranging class before for dinner with erica.
For dinner we went out with Ericka and some of her friends for a traditional Japanese meal. Ericka is a local who had come to ASU for a brief visit. She is a friend of Dr. Chen and Dr. Fox, basically she was a bit lost on campus and wanted to talk to some one who knew her language culture and got Dr. Fox from what I understood. Several of her friends are graduating soon or have graduated and are lining up big time business and marketing jobs all over the world.
Lastly, we took a stroll through the red light district, guided by Dr. Chen. Let's just say it was interesting, and I taught Dr. Chen the word Sketchy!!! Needless to say, I think that I will avoid such places at night for the rest of the trip because it was bit sketchy just because everyone was trying to get us into their shops.. Now to Bed, I feel so tired which seems stupid because I feel like I have done nothing.,
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